summer

My blog feels unfamiliar and writing strangely daunting. I give it yet another new face and hope that the words will flood to me when promised a quiet sanctuary. The new space takes on the peace and minimalism that I wish I could bring to my own head. There is so much noise; it will be days before the din quells into a quiet rumble.

I lose sense of time. My head throbs in pain and my boyfriend looks at me with fear and sadness in his eyes. My days are a blur upon reflection. I cannot distinguish the overarching feeling of the time; through the fog I remember long lunches in the sunshine, interesting conversations with strangers, nights spent cuddling and planning with my love. But I also remember letting five days pass without taking essential care of and sobbing quietly in the car home from my brother's wonderful 21st dinner when barely minutes before I had been laughing gaily and teasing my siblings.

An old friend picks me up and we follow the road to the sea. My father lived here once, not so long ago, but we do not pass his old home. Port Willunga has never looked so beautiful. I didn't realise how much I needed to see the sea and run around on the beach. The sun browns my skin as we wade out deep into the clear water. I cannot remember the last time I was in the sea, but I feel as though I could stay here for the rest of time. I sink down and let the water consume me. It is blissful oblivion and I could be the only person in the whole world. We splash and laugh and I am teased for my poor catching skills. I bond with my friend's twelve-year-old sister and carry her around on my back so she can catch the ball on my behalf.

Back at the house we delight in a long, lazy lunch and grand conversation. I am the only person at the table who has yet to live in a non-English speaking country and a burning desire to catch a plane right now comes over me momentarily. I remind myself that my adventures with Tom are only just beginning. I quietly plan our next adventure, caught by a lust for a change of scenery.

I wish every day of summer could be defined by such beautiful surroundings and interesting folk.